Funny stuff... : One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. : : Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't : feel like it, I just want you to hold me." : : I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" : : So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to : hear... : : "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough : for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." : : She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me : for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" : : Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to : sleep. : : The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time : with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, : big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried : on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which : one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new : shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for : each outfit." : : We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of : diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have : thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she : was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she : doesn't even know how to play tennis. : : I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She : was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. : Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is : all dear, let's go to the cashier." : : I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't : feel like it." : : Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, : "WHAT?" : : I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. : You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for : me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." : : And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I : added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things : I buy you?" : : Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that : bitch knows I'm smarter than her. -- Onideus Mad Hatter mhm ? x ? http://www.backwater-productions.net http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog Hatter Quotes ------------- "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the best." "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you with it." "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my bad." "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others of its relevancy." "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just givin em out for free." "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, to their merry little mess." "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible images burned into their tiny little minds'." "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." "Those who record history are those who control history." "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you don't get sent to me...I come for you." "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a function?" "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast indicates an increase in Webtv users." "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
Wow..typical of one who works at wally*world and no life to spend their waking hours reading myspace *sniker* "Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message news:1o3vk35t810638rfa9eg7pbpqa3vnf2bm2@4ax.com... > Funny stuff... > > : One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. > : > : Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I > don't > : feel like it, I just want you to hold me." > : > : I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" > : > : So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to > : hear... > : > : "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough > : for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." > : > : She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me > : for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" > : > : Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to > : sleep. > : > : The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time > : with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a > big, > : big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she > tried > : on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide > which > : one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new > : shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for > : each outfit." > : > : We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of > : diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must > have > : thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she > : was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she > : doesn't even know how to play tennis. > : > : I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She > : was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. > : Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is > : all dear, let's go to the cashier." > : > : I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't > : feel like it." > : > : Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a > baffled, > : "WHAT?" > : > : I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. > : You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for > : me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." > : > : And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I > : added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the > things > : I buy you?" > : > : Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that > : bitch knows I'm smarter than her. > > -- > > Onideus Mad Hatter > mhm ? x ? > http://www.backwater-productions.net > http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog > > > Hatter Quotes > ------------- > "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the > best." > > "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you > with it." > > "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." > > "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." > > "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" > > "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my > bad." > > "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." > > "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." > > "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity > of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" > > "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct > that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others > of its relevancy." > > "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start > creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." > > "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." > > "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that > they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just > givin em out for free." > > "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. > So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, > to their merry little mess." > > "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly > horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip > their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand > sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible > images burned into their tiny little minds'." > > "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even > properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." > > "Those who record history are those who control history." > > "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, > endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you > don't get sent to me...I come for you." > > "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton > tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." > > "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a > function?" > > "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. > Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast > indicates an increase in Webtv users." > > "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, > gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
On Thu, 29 Nov 2007 23:51:17 -0600, "GeekBoy" <nerd_revenge@nerdytwo.net> wrote: >Wo<COCK SLAP> I'm sorry, but all top poasting fuckwits have been banned from the Usenets. There's the door, please leave your butthurts ass now. -- Onideus Mad Hatter mhm ? x ? http://www.backwater-productions.net http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog Hatter Quotes ------------- "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the best." "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you with it." "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my bad." "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others of its relevancy." "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just givin em out for free." "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, to their merry little mess." "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible images burned into their tiny little minds'." "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." "Those who record history are those who control history." "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you don't get sent to me...I come for you." "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a function?" "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast indicates an increase in Webtv users." "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
In article <474fa4d5$0$9553$4c368faf@roadrunner.com>, GeekBoy took the hamburger meat, threw it on the grill, and I said "Oh Wow"... > Wow..typical of one who works at wally*world and no life to spend their > waking hours reading myspace > > *sniker* > Not to defend him or anything, but that was pretty funny. -- trippy mhm31x9 Smeeter#29 WSD#30 sTaRShInE_mOOnBeAm aT HoTmAil dOt CoM http://www.myspace.com/starshine_moonbeam NP: "You Can't Kill Rock N' Roll" -- Ozzy Osbourne "What did I tell the kid. It's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. It's about how much you can take, and keep moving forward. Get up." -- Sylvester Stallone "Rocky Balboa"
trippy wrote: > In article <474fa4d5$0$9553$4c368faf@roadrunner.com>, GeekBoy took the > hamburger meat, threw it on the grill, and I said "Oh Wow"... > >> Wow..typical of one who works at wally*world and no life to spend their >> waking hours reading myspace >> >> *sniker* >> > > Not to defend him or anything, but that was pretty funny. > > It is also a *very* old joke. -- Froz... Lits Slut#9
Onideus Mad Hatter wrote: > Funny stuff... > > : One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. > : > : Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't > : feel like it, I just want you to hold me." > : > : I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" > : > : So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to > : hear... > : > : "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough > : for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." > : > : She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me > : for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" > : > : Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to > : sleep. > : > : The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time > : with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, > : big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried > : on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which > : one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new > : shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for > : each outfit." > : > : We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of > : diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have > : thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she > : was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she > : doesn't even know how to play tennis. > : > : I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She > : was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. > : Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is > : all dear, let's go to the cashier." > : > : I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't > : feel like it." > : > : Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, > : "WHAT?" > : > : I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. > : You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for > : me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." > : > : And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I > : added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things > : I buy you?" > : > : Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that > : bitch knows I'm smarter than her. > > -- > > Onideus Mad Hatter > mhm ? x ? > http://www.backwater-productions.net > http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog > > > Hatter Quotes > ------------- > "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the > best." > > "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you > with it." > > "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." > > "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." > > "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" > > "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my > bad." > > "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." > > "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." > > "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity > of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" > > "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct > that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others > of its relevancy." > > "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start > creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." > > "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." > > "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that > they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just > givin em out for free." > > "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. > So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, > to their merry little mess." > > "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly > horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip > their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand > sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible > images burned into their tiny little minds'." > > "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even > properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." > > "Those who record history are those who control history." > > "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, > endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you > don't get sent to me...I come for you." > > "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton > tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." > > "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a > function?" > > "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. > Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast > indicates an increase in Webtv users." > > "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, > gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, ) Oh man im laughing to hard to type... That is some funny shit!
There's one topposter still here... and learn to spell while you're at it ----- Original Message ----- From: "Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> Newsgroups: alt.2600,alt.alien.vampire.flonk.flonk.flonk,alt.design.graphics Sent: Thursday, November 29, 2007 11:58 PM Subject: Re: Someone Posted This On MySpace > On Thu, 29 Nov 2007 23:51:17 -0600, "GeekBoy" > <nerd_revenge@nerdytwo.net> wrote: > > >Wo<COCK SLAP> > > I'm sorry, but all top poasting fuckwits have been banned from the > Usenets. There's the door, please leave your butthurts ass now. > > -- > > Onideus Mad Hatter > mhm ? x ? > http://www.backwater-productions.net > http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog > > > Hatter Quotes > ------------- > "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the > best." > > "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you > with it." > > "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." > > "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." > > "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" > > "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my > bad." > > "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." > > "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." > > "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity > of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" > > "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct > that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others > of its relevancy." > > "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start > creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." > > "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." > > "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that > they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just > givin em out for free." > > "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. > So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, > to their merry little mess." > > "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly > horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip > their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand > sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible > images burned into their tiny little minds'." > > "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even > properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." > > "Those who record history are those who control history." > > "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, > endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you > don't get sent to me...I come for you." > > "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton > tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." > > "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a > function?" > > "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. > Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast > indicates an increase in Webtv users." > > "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, > gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, ) I don't understand what's the big deal about top vs bottom posting...
On Sat, 1 Dec 2007 17:37:07 -0600, "Jonathan Herr" <dracosilver@wi.rr.com> wrote: >Th<COCK SLAP> Sorry, but you're not allowed to speak to me like a human being until you can figure out how NOT to fuck up thread continuity. -- Onideus Mad Hatter mhm ? x ? http://www.backwater-productions.net http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog Hatter Quotes ------------- "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the best." "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you with it." "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my bad." "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others of its relevancy." "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just givin em out for free." "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, to their merry little mess." "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible images burned into their tiny little minds'." "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." "Those who record history are those who control history." "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you don't get sent to me...I come for you." "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a function?" "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast indicates an increase in Webtv users." "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
"Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message news:vi9vk39iqtteb8ou6pqrvbitn3jco7rskd@4ax.com... > On Thu, 29 Nov 2007 23:51:17 -0600, "GeekBoy" > <nerd_revenge@nerdytwo.net> wrote: > >>Wo<COCK SLAP> > > I'm sorry, but all top poasting fuckwits have been banned from the > Usenets. There's the door, please leave your butthurts ass now. > Cock slap?? Well that makes you decidedly unarmed. Maybe Vienna Sausage slap? > -- > > Onideus Mad Hatter > mhm ? x ? > http://www.backwater-productions.net > http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog > > > Hatter Quotes > ------------- > "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the > best." > > "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you > with it." > > "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." > > "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." > > "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" > > "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my > bad." > > "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." > > "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." > > "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity > of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" > > "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct > that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others > of its relevancy." > > "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start > creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." > > "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." > > "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that > they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just > givin em out for free." > > "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. > So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, > to their merry little mess." > > "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly > horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip > their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand > sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible > images burned into their tiny little minds'." > > "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even > properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." > > "Those who record history are those who control history." > > "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, > endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you > don't get sent to me...I come for you." > > "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton > tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." > > "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a > function?" > > "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. > Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast > indicates an increase in Webtv users." > > "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, > gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
On Sun, 2 Dec 2007 09:18:14 -0600, "GeekBoy" <nerd_revenge@nerdytwo.net> wrote: > >"Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message >news:vi9vk39iqtteb8ou6pqrvbitn3jco7rskd@4ax.com... >> On Thu, 29 Nov 2007 23:51:17 -0600, "GeekBoy" >> <nerd_revenge@nerdytwo.net> wrote: >> >>>Wo<COCK SLAP> >> >> I'm sorry, but all top poasting fuckwits have been banned from the >> Usenets. There's the door, please leave your butthurts ass now. >> > > > >Cock sl<COCK SLAP> You like my cock, huh? Show us all how much you love having my cock slapped across your ugly face by replying again. Go on, show everyone just how much. ^_^ -- Onideus Mad Hatter mhm ? x ? http://www.backwater-productions.net http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog Hatter Quotes ------------- "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the best." "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you with it." "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my bad." "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others of its relevancy." "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just givin em out for free." "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, to their merry little mess." "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible images burned into their tiny little minds'." "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." "Those who record history are those who control history." "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you don't get sent to me...I come for you." "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a function?" "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast indicates an increase in Webtv users." "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
"Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message news:tsp5l316omsch8dpvelljt4fapr34r3cp5@4ax.com... > On Sun, 2 Dec 2007 09:18:14 -0600, "GeekBoy" > <nerd_revenge@nerdytwo.net> wrote: > >> >>"Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message >>news:vi9vk39iqtteb8ou6pqrvbitn3jco7rskd@4ax.com... >>> On Thu, 29 Nov 2007 23:51:17 -0600, "GeekBoy" >>> <nerd_revenge@nerdytwo.net> wrote: >>> >>>>Wo<COCK SLAP> >>> >>> I'm sorry, but all top poasting fuckwits have been banned from the >>> Usenets. There's the door, please leave your butthurts ass now. >>> >> >> >> >>Cock sl<VIENNA SLAP> > > You like my Vienna Sausage, huh? Show us all how much you love having my > Vienna Sausage > slapped across your fine face by replying again. Go on, show everyone > just how much. ^_^ Hope you enjoy it. > > -- > > Onideus Mad Hatter > mhm ? x ? > http://www.backwater-productions.net > http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog > > > Hatter Quotes > ------------- > "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the > best." > > "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you > with it." > > "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." > > "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." > > "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" > > "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my > bad." > > "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." > > "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." > > "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity > of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" > > "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct > that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others > of its relevancy." > > "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start > creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." > > "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." > > "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that > they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just > givin em out for free." > > "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. > So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, > to their merry little mess." > > "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly > horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip > their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand > sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible > images burned into their tiny little minds'." > > "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even > properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." > > "Those who record history are those who control history." > > "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, > endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you > don't get sent to me...I come for you." > > "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton > tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." > > "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a > function?" > > "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. > Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast > indicates an increase in Webtv users." > > "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, > gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
Don't fight it, Wes Magyar...Just lie down and try to relax: >Onideus Mad Hatter wrote: >> Funny stuff... >> >> : One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. >> : >> : Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't >> : feel like it, I just want you to hold me." >> : >> : I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" >> : >> : So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to >> : hear... >> : >> : "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough >> : for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." >> : >> : She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me >> : for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" >> : >> : Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to >> : sleep. >> : >> : The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time >> : with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, >> : big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried >> : on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which >> : one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new >> : shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for >> : each outfit." >> : >> : We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of >> : diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have >> : thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she >> : was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she >> : doesn't even know how to play tennis. >> : >> : I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She >> : was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. >> : Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is >> : all dear, let's go to the cashier." >> : >> : I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't >> : feel like it." >> : >> : Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, >> : "WHAT?" >> : >> : I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. >> : You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for >> : me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." >> : >> : And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I >> : added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things >> : I buy you?" >> : >> : Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that >> : bitch knows I'm smarter than her. >> >> -- >> >> Onideus Mad Hatter >> mhm ? x ? >> http://www.backwater-productions.net >> http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog >> >> >> Hatter Quotes >> ------------- >> "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the >> best." >> >> "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you >> with it." >> >> "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." >> >> "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." >> >> "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" >> >> "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my >> bad." >> >> "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." >> >> "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." >> >> "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity >> of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" >> >> "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct >> that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others >> of its relevancy." >> >> "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start >> creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." >> >> "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." >> >> "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that >> they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just >> givin em out for free." >> >> "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. >> So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, >> to their merry little mess." >> >> "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly >> horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip >> their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand >> sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible >> images burned into their tiny little minds'." >> >> "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even >> properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." >> >> "Those who record history are those who control history." >> >> "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, >> endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you >> don't get sent to me...I come for you." >> >> "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton >> tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." >> >> "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a >> function?" >> >> "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. >> Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast >> indicates an increase in Webtv users." >> >> "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, >> gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, ) > >Oh man im laughing to hard to type... That is some funny shit! I am glad you found it "funny." Too bad you don't have sense enough to ignore it like the rest of us, but, oh well, we can't all rise above the status of "lowest common denominator." Kudos to you!
On Mon, 03 Dec 2007 03:40:10 -0500, Wavy G <imprecious@dontyouthink.co.zw> wrote: >Don't fight it, Wes Magyar...Just lie down and try to relax: > >>Onideus Mad Hatter wrote: >>> Funny stuff... >>> >>> : One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. >>> : >>> : Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't >>> : feel like it, I just want you to hold me." >>> : >>> : I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" >>> : >>> : So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to >>> : hear... >>> : >>> : "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough >>> : for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." >>> : >>> : She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me >>> : for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" >>> : >>> : Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to >>> : sleep. >>> : >>> : The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time >>> : with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, >>> : big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried >>> : on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which >>> : one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new >>> : shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for >>> : each outfit." >>> : >>> : We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of >>> : diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have >>> : thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she >>> : was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she >>> : doesn't even know how to play tennis. >>> : >>> : I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She >>> : was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. >>> : Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is >>> : all dear, let's go to the cashier." >>> : >>> : I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't >>> : feel like it." >>> : >>> : Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, >>> : "WHAT?" >>> : >>> : I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. >>> : You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for >>> : me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." >>> : >>> : And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I >>> : added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things >>> : I buy you?" >>> : >>> : Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that >>> : bitch knows I'm smarter than her. >>> >>> -- >>> >>> Onideus Mad Hatter >>> mhm ? x ? >>> http://www.backwater-productions.net >>> http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog >>> >>> >>> Hatter Quotes >>> ------------- >>> "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the >>> best." >>> >>> "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you >>> with it." >>> >>> "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." >>> >>> "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." >>> >>> "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" >>> >>> "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my >>> bad." >>> >>> "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." >>> >>> "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." >>> >>> "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity >>> of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" >>> >>> "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct >>> that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others >>> of its relevancy." >>> >>> "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start >>> creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." >>> >>> "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." >>> >>> "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that >>> they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just >>> givin em out for free." >>> >>> "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. >>> So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, >>> to their merry little mess." >>> >>> "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly >>> horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip >>> their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand >>> sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible >>> images burned into their tiny little minds'." >>> >>> "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even >>> properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." >>> >>> "Those who record history are those who control history." >>> >>> "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, >>> endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you >>> don't get sent to me...I come for you." >>> >>> "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton >>> tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." >>> >>> "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a >>> function?" >>> >>> "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. >>> Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast >>> indicates an increase in Webtv users." >>> >>> "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, >>> gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, ) >> >>Oh man im laughing to hard to type... That is some funny shit! > >I am glad you found it "funny." Too bad you don't have sense enough to >ignore it like the rest of us, but, oh well, we can't all rise above the >status of "lowest common denominator." Kudos to you! It's cute how you have such a NEED to try and explain to all of us "lcds" about how you're *SO* "sophisticated" and all. Kind of ironic though, when you think about it. I mean if we were such lowly, unimportant posters it seems odd that you would actually go out of your way to try and explain and justify your worthless opinions. -- Onideus Mad Hatter mhm ? x ? http://www.backwater-productions.net http://www.backwater-productions.net/hatter-blog Hatter Quotes ------------- "You're only one of the best if you're striving to become one of the best." "I didn't make reality, Sunshine, I just verbally bitch slapped you with it." "I'm not a professional, I'm an artist." "Your Usenet blinders are my best friend." "Usenet Filters - Learn to shut yourself the fuck up!" "Drugs killed Jesus you know...oh wait, no, that was the Jews, my bad." "There are clingy things in the grass...burrs 'n such...mmmm..." "The more I learn the more I'm killing my idols." "Is it wrong to incur and then use the hate ridden, vengeful stupidity of complete strangers in random Usenet froups to further my art?" "Freedom is only a concept, like race it's merely a social construct that doesn't really exist outside of your ability to convince others of its relevancy." "Next time slow up a lil, then maybe you won't jump the gun and start creamin yer panties before it's time to pop the champagne proper." "Reality is directly proportionate to how creative you are." "People are pretty fucking high on themselves if they think that they're just born with a soul. *snicker*...yeah, like they're just givin em out for free." "Quible, quible said the Hare. Quite a lot of quibling...everywhere. So the Hare took a long stare and decided at best, to leave the rest, to their merry little mess." "There's a difference between 'bad' and 'so earth shatteringly horrible it makes the angels scream in terror as they violently rip their heads off, their blood spraying into the faces of a thousand sweet innocent horrified children, who will forever have the terrible images burned into their tiny little minds'." "How sad that you're such a poor judge of style that you can't even properly gauge the artistic worth of your own efforts." "Those who record history are those who control history." "I am the living embodiment of hell itself in all its tormentive rage, endless suffering, unfathomable pain and unending horror...but you don't get sent to me...I come for you." "Ideally in a fight I'd want a BGM-109A with a W80 250 kiloton tactical thermonuclear fusion based war head." "Tell me, would you describe yourself more as a process or a function?" "Apparently this group has got the market cornered on stupid. Intelligence is down 137 points across the board and the forecast indicates an increase in Webtv users." "Is my .sig delimiter broken? Really? You're sure? Awww, gee...that's too bad...for YOU!" `, )
Is there a written rule as to which is right? Top Posting? "Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message news:v9l4l3ls32g319kceftug985su3mgmmsva@4ax.com... > On Sat, 1 Dec 2007 17:37:07 -0600, "Jonathan Herr" > <dracosilver@wi.rr.com> wrote: > > >Th<COCK SLAP> > > So<Trimmed useless garbage> Or Bottom posting? Well what is it? And why are you so touchy about it?
Don't fight it, Jonathan Herr...Just lie down and try to relax: >Is there a written rule as to which is right? Top Posting? Top posting is WRONG. Ask anywon. > >"Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message >news:v9l4l3ls32g319kceftug985su3mgmmsva@4ax.com... >> On Sat, 1 Dec 2007 17:37:07 -0600, "Jonathan Herr" >> <dracosilver@wi.rr.com> wrote: >> >> >Th<COCK SLAP> >> >> So<Trimmed useless garbage> > >Or Bottom posting? > >Well what is it? > >And why are you so touchy about it? I don't know. What the fuck is "bottom posting," anyway? Sounds to me like a term top-posters made up as an intentional antithesis to top posting, just for the sake of argument. Look. This isn't hard. Just insert your reply *after* the comment to which you're replying. Why is this concept so difficult to grasp? I am glad to have helped. Love, Wavy G -- "Memo to God: Last two things to do: (1) Cancel Wavy. (2) Turn out the lights." --Mimus submits a rewrite for the ending of The Bible. ***************************************** * * * Wavy G * * mail me at: * * godsspeciallamb @ gmail.com * * * * * *****************************************
"Wavy G" <godsspeciallamb@gmail.com> wrote in message news:c7qpl3tarnap74i5nntnhe72qm9p2j1vo5@4ax.com... > Don't fight it, Jonathan Herr...Just lie down and try to relax: > > >Is there a written rule as to which is right? Top Posting? > > Top posting is WRONG. Ask anywon. > > > > >"Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message > >news:v9l4l3ls32g319kceftug985su3mgmmsva@4ax.com... > >> On Sat, 1 Dec 2007 17:37:07 -0600, "Jonathan Herr" > >> <dracosilver@wi.rr.com> wrote: > >> > >> >Th<COCK SLAP> > >> > >> So<Trimmed useless garbage> > > > >Or Bottom posting? > > > >Well what is it? > > > >And why are you so touchy about it? > > I don't know. What the fuck is "bottom posting," anyway? Sounds to me > like a term top-posters made up as an intentional antithesis to top > posting, just for the sake of argument. > > Look. This isn't hard. Just insert your reply *after* the comment to > which you're replying. Why is this concept so difficult to grasp? > > I am glad to have helped. I'm joking around a bit... I'm pushing Onideus Mad Hatter's buttons as it were. His seemingly quick overreaction is what I was reacting to in a way...
Don't fight it, Jonathan Herr...Just lie down and try to relax: > >"Wavy G" <godsspeciallamb@gmail.com> wrote in message >news:c7qpl3tarnap74i5nntnhe72qm9p2j1vo5@4ax.com... >> Don't fight it, Jonathan Herr...Just lie down and try to relax: >> >> >Is there a written rule as to which is right? Top Posting? >> >> Top posting is WRONG. Ask anywon. >> >> > >> >"Onideus Mad Hatter" <usenet@backwater-productions.net> wrote in message >> >news:v9l4l3ls32g319kceftug985su3mgmmsva@4ax.com... >> >> On Sat, 1 Dec 2007 17:37:07 -0600, "Jonathan Herr" >> >> <dracosilver@wi.rr.com> wrote: >> >> >> >> >Th<COCK SLAP> >> >> >> >> So<Trimmed useless garbage> >> > >> >Or Bottom posting? >> > >> >Well what is it? >> > >> >And why are you so touchy about it? >> >> I don't know. What the fuck is "bottom posting," anyway? Sounds to me >> like a term top-posters made up as an intentional antithesis to top >> posting, just for the sake of argument. >> >> Look. This isn't hard. Just insert your reply *after* the comment to >> which you're replying. Why is this concept so difficult to grasp? >> >> I am glad to have helped. > >I'm joking around a bit... I'm pushing Onideus Mad Hatter's buttons as it >were. > >His seemingly quick overreaction is what I was reacting to in a way... Oh. Yeah, that guy. Well, I don't know. Go ahead, and give it a try. I think you *may* be wasting your time with him, but see what you get out of him. He's definitely a "kook," though. -- "Memo to God: Last two things to do: (1) Cancel Wavy. (2) Turn out the lights." --Mimus submits a rewrite for the ending of The Bible. ***************************************** * * * Wavy G * * mail me at: * * godsspeciallamb @ gmail.com * * * * * *****************************************
