Re: 05/10/20 Puns

Discussion in 'Chatter' started by Tim Bruening, Dec 28, 2007.

  1. Tim Bruening

    Tim Bruening Guest

    nemo wrote:

    > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > news:4539CEED.8933A6AD@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > >
    > >
    > > nemo wrote:
    > >
    > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > news:45388449.F67F81B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > >
    > > > >
    > > > > nemo wrote:
    > > > >
    > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > > > news:4358929C.4B169CC1@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > > > BLT: Apine fast food.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > BO: Smelly bee.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > BP: Bee urine.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > BS: Apine shit.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > BT: Bee beverage.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > Occupants: Clothing worn by conquering troops.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > Tucker: Dog that puts people to bed.
    > > > > >
    > > > > > Counterpain: Bed cover for people who get hurt feet from serving in

    > a
    > > > shop
    > > > > > all day!
    > > > >
    > > > > V-Power: Vampire gasoline.
    > > >
    > > > Someone's domescicated Usenet trouble-maker: Petrol.

    > >
    > > Domesti Kate: Woman who's good at taming husbands.
    > >

    > Unlike the failed lion tamer, Claude Bottom!
    >
    > *.RARrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
    >
    > Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!


    Animal Rings: Bearing (Ursine), Boaring (pig), Roaring (lion).
     
  2. nemo

    nemo Guest

    "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    news:4774FB75.B46A6BCA@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    >
    >
    > nemo wrote:
    >
    > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > news:4539CEED.8933A6AD@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > >
    > > >
    > > > nemo wrote:
    > > >
    > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > > news:45388449.F67F81B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > >
    > > > > >
    > > > > > nemo wrote:
    > > > > >
    > > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > > > > news:4358929C.4B169CC1@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > > > > BLT: Apine fast food.
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > BO: Smelly bee.
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > BP: Bee urine.
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > BS: Apine shit.
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > BT: Bee beverage.
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > Occupants: Clothing worn by conquering troops.
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > Tucker: Dog that puts people to bed.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > Counterpain: Bed cover for people who get hurt feet from serving

    in
    > > a
    > > > > shop
    > > > > > > all day!
    > > > > >
    > > > > > V-Power: Vampire gasoline.
    > > > >
    > > > > Someone's domescicated Usenet trouble-maker: Petrol.
    > > >
    > > > Domesti Kate: Woman who's good at taming husbands.
    > > >

    > > Unlike the failed lion tamer, Claude Bottom!
    > >
    > > *.RARrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
    > >
    > > Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!

    >
    > Animal Rings: Bearing (Ursine), Boaring (pig), Roaring (lion).
    >

    What about Catering?

    J.A.P.: A girl who's been breast-fed by caterers!!
    (Joan Rivers - taykh it away!!)
     
  3. Tim Bruening

    Tim Bruening Guest

    nemo wrote:

    > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > news:4774FB75.B46A6BCA@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > >
    > >
    > > nemo wrote:
    > >
    > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > news:4539CEED.8933A6AD@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > >
    > > > >
    > > > > nemo wrote:
    > > > >
    > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > > > news:45388449.F67F81B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > nemo wrote:
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > > > > > news:4358929C.4B169CC1@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > > > > > BLT: Apine fast food.
    > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > BO: Smelly bee.
    > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > BP: Bee urine.
    > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > BS: Apine shit.
    > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > BT: Bee beverage.
    > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > Occupants: Clothing worn by conquering troops.
    > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > Tucker: Dog that puts people to bed.
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > Counterpain: Bed cover for people who get hurt feet from serving

    > in
    > > > a
    > > > > > shop
    > > > > > > > all day!
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > V-Power: Vampire gasoline.
    > > > > >
    > > > > > Someone's domescicated Usenet trouble-maker: Petrol.
    > > > >
    > > > > Domesti Kate: Woman who's good at taming husbands.
    > > > >
    > > > Unlike the failed lion tamer, Claude Bottom!
    > > >
    > > > *.RARrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
    > > >
    > > > Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!

    > >
    > > Animal Rings: Bearing (Ursine), Boaring (pig), Roaring (lion).
    > >

    > What about Catering?


    Purring: Ring of felines.
     
  4. nemo

    nemo Guest

    "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    news:4775FA19.6E6A7997@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    >
    >
    > nemo wrote:
    >
    > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > news:4774FB75.B46A6BCA@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > >
    > > >
    > > > nemo wrote:
    > > >
    > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > > news:4539CEED.8933A6AD@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > >
    > > > > >
    > > > > > nemo wrote:
    > > > > >
    > > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
    > > > > > > news:45388449.F67F81B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > nemo wrote:
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in

    message
    > > > > > > > > news:4358929C.4B169CC1@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
    > > > > > > > > > BLT: Apine fast food.
    > > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > > BO: Smelly bee.
    > > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > > BP: Bee urine.
    > > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > > BS: Apine shit.
    > > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > > BT: Bee beverage.
    > > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > > Occupants: Clothing worn by conquering troops.
    > > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > > Tucker: Dog that puts people to bed.
    > > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > > Counterpain: Bed cover for people who get hurt feet from

    serving
    > > in
    > > > > a
    > > > > > > shop
    > > > > > > > > all day!
    > > > > > > >
    > > > > > > > V-Power: Vampire gasoline.
    > > > > > >
    > > > > > > Someone's domescicated Usenet trouble-maker: Petrol.
    > > > > >
    > > > > > Domesti Kate: Woman who's good at taming husbands.
    > > > > >
    > > > > Unlike the failed lion tamer, Claude Bottom!
    > > > >
    > > > > *.RARrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
    > > > >
    > > > > Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!
    > > >
    > > > Animal Rings: Bearing (Ursine), Boaring (pig), Roaring (lion).
    > > >

    > > What about Catering?

    >
    > Purring: Ring of felines.
    >

    "Don't kill that randy tom-cat! You'll hurt his felines!"

    Cats on the Rooftops

    chor:

    Cats on the rooftops, cats on the tiles
    Cats with syphilis, cats with piles
    Cats with their arseholes wreathed in smiles
    Revel in the joys of fornication.

    The crocodile is a funny animile
    He only comes once in a very great while
    But when he comes he floods the Nile
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The donkey is a lonely bloke
    He very seldom wets his poke
    But when he does, he lets it soak
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The camel has a lot of fun
    His night's complete when he is done
    For he always has two humps for one
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The baboon's rear is an eerie sight
    His asshole gleams like a neon light
    And when he comes, he lights the night
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The monkey, good as monkeys go,
    Erect can go an inch or so
    And when he comes, it's time to go
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The poor domestic doggie, on his chain all day
    Seldom gets a chance to go and let himself play
    So he licks his little dick, in a very frantic way
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The hippopotamus, so it seems,
    Very seldom has wet dreams
    But when he does, it comes in streams
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The whale is a mammal, as everybody knows
    He takes two days to take a shag and when he's in the throes
    He doesn't stop to take it out, but piddles through his nose
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The ostrich in the desert is a solitary chick
    Without the frequent opportunity to go and dip his wick
    But when he does, it slips in thick
    As he revels in the joys of fornication.

    The bee disports among the trees
    And there consorts with whom he please,
    And fills the land with sons of bees
    Who revel in the joys of fornication.

    The clam is a paragon of purity
    And we can't tell a he from she,
    But he can tell, and so can she
    When they revel in the joys of fornication.

    The owls in the trees and the cats on the tiles
    One fucks in solitude, the other fucks in piles
    You can hear their yowls and howls and moans and groans for miles and miles
    When they revel in the joys of fornication.

    tune: John Peel
    RG, PZP, CFBW, AF, JR, MS
     

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