15 December Puns

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:489C2C22.29B9448F@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > <big snip.
> >
> > Maxwell: Biggest hole in the ground containing water.
>
> Does it make entropy go backwards?

Entropy: A cup awarded to a chicken for finding the way in.

 

nemo wrote:

> Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:42296AEC.D19632F5@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > "nemo" <nemo@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> > news:<B5rWc.270897$a8.238664@fe2.news.blueyonder.co.uk>...
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4129AFC7.F6E073B5@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Sheila Dundee wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > J. A. Mc. wrote:
> > > > > > On Mon, 5 Jan 2004 17:22:24 +1030, "Sheila Dundee"
> > > > > > <CorKa@optusnetXCAPS.com.au> found these unused words
floating
> > about:
> > > > > >
> > > > > >> Kathy wrote:
> > > > > >>> "nemo" <nemo@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> > > > > >>> news:si_Jb.309341$Y72.81374@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > > > > >>>> Sung by a couple of pimps who run a group of girls
working at
> > the
> > > > > >>>> top the the Telecomm Tower:
> > > > > >>>>
> > > > > >>>> "High ho! High ho! It's off to work we go . . . . "
> > > > > >>>>
> > > > > >>> Feeling a little flushed, off they go to the johns.
> > > > > >>
> > > > > >> I was loose myself yesterday but I hope to pickup today.
> > > > > >>
> > > > > > It's about time Tundra some work out of you! <G>
> > > > >
> > > > > Icy they have new wipers!
> > > >
> > > > Viper: Snakes used to clean wet windshields.
> > > >
> > > > Viper: Snake price.
> > > >
> > > > Saturn: Car with a ring.
> > > >
> > > Viper: Snake price???
> > >
> > > Sod it! I've adder nough!
> >
> > Subtract: A political document (such as the Communist Manifesto)
under
> > water.
> >
> Manny Festo: A guy with a nasty skin condition.
>
> Manny Pesto: A guy with a nasty a pine kernel and herb sauce all over
him.
>
> Pine Kernel: A high-ranking Lumberjack.

Manny: Knee of a male adult.

 

nemo wrote:

> "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4253589E.AE640C0C@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:425244B2.31775DB2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > nemo wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

> > > > > news:424E6046.A49B075B@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > >
> > > > > > shelly <scouvrette@bluemarble.net> wrote in message
> > > > > >
news:<Pine.BSF.4.56.0410140948050.58891@tesla.bluemarble.net>...
> > > > > > > on 2004-10-14 at 05:05 <vijaynats@yahoo.com> wrote:
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > >It's my pleasure to stretch it longer!
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > won't *somebody* think of the kittens?
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Kitten: The 10th do it yourself package.
> > > > >
> > > > > You can trip over these if you go out on a moggie day!
> > > >
> > > > Tool Kit: Cat that carries tools.
> > > >
> > > Most workmen use belts made of saddle-leather these days. They
think
> having
> > > all those various tools at the ready in the proximity of their
wedding
> > > tackle makes 'em look dead butch, ducky!
> >
> > Proximity: Glove near by.
> >
> Proximity Fuse: Glove exploding nearby. (Swunword.)

Primitive: Low tech glove.

 

"J. A. Mc." wrote:

> On Fri, 5 Nov 2004 20:42:48 -0000, "Raphael Kearns"
> <raphael@kearns.fsnet.co.uk> found these unused words floating about:
>
> >
> >"nemo" <nemo@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> >news:yPQid.35936$Bk6.13578@fe2.news.blueyonder.co.uk...
> >>
> >> Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> >> news:4189BB3B.3A410D4B@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >>> Packed Audience: Lots of suitcases in the auditorium.
> >>
> >>
> >> Auditorium: Place where Conservatives keep their Audinary cars.
> >>
> >>For those of us who cant Afford them
> >
> Haven't you Benz working?

Working: King of labor.

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:48A512D9.89D8587@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:42296AEC.D19632F5@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > > "nemo" <nemo@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> > > news:<B5rWc.270897$a8.238664@fe2.news.blueyonder.co.uk>...
> > > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > news:4129AFC7.F6E073B5@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > Sheila Dundee wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > > J. A. Mc. wrote:
> > > > > > > On Mon, 5 Jan 2004 17:22:24 +1030, "Sheila Dundee"
> > > > > > > <CorKa@optusnetXCAPS.com.au> found these unused words
> floating
> > > about:
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > >> Kathy wrote:
> > > > > > >>> "nemo" <nemo@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> > > > > > >>> news:si_Jb.309341$Y72.81374@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > > > > > >>>> Sung by a couple of pimps who run a group of girls
> working at
> > > the
> > > > > > >>>> top the the Telecomm Tower:
> > > > > > >>>>
> > > > > > >>>> "High ho! High ho! It's off to work we go . . . . "
> > > > > > >>>>
> > > > > > >>> Feeling a little flushed, off they go to the johns.
> > > > > > >>
> > > > > > >> I was loose myself yesterday but I hope to pickup today.
> > > > > > >>
> > > > > > > It's about time Tundra some work out of you! <G>
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Icy they have new wipers!
> > > > >
> > > > > Viper: Snakes used to clean wet windshields.
> > > > >
> > > > > Viper: Snake price.
> > > > >
> > > > > Saturn: Car with a ring.
> > > > >
> > > > Viper: Snake price???
> > > >
> > > > Sod it! I've adder nough!
> > >
> > > Subtract: A political document (such as the Communist Manifesto)
> under
> > > water.
> > >
> > Manny Festo: A guy with a nasty skin condition.
> >
> > Manny Pesto: A guy with a nasty a pine kernel and herb sauce all over
> him.
> >
> > Pine Kernel: A high-ranking Lumberjack.
>
> Manny: Knee of a male adult.

Manny Moore: A Yiddisher cloning expert.

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:48A51346.6DEEB26@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:4253589E.AE640C0C@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > >
> > > nemo wrote:
> > >
> > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > news:425244B2.31775DB2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > nemo wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
>
> > > > > > news:424E6046.A49B075B@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > shelly <scouvrette@bluemarble.net> wrote in message
> > > > > > >
> news:<Pine.BSF.4.56.0410140948050.58891@tesla.bluemarble.net>...
> > > > > > > > on 2004-10-14 at 05:05 <vijaynats@yahoo.com> wrote:
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > >It's my pleasure to stretch it longer!
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > won't *somebody* think of the kittens?
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Kitten: The 10th do it yourself package.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > You can trip over these if you go out on a moggie day!
> > > > >
> > > > > Tool Kit: Cat that carries tools.
> > > > >
> > > > Most workmen use belts made of saddle-leather these days. They
> think
> > having
> > > > all those various tools at the ready in the proximity of their
> wedding
> > > > tackle makes 'em look dead butch, ducky!
> > >
> > > Proximity: Glove near by.
> > >
> > Proximity Fuse: Glove exploding nearby. (Swunword.)
>
> Primitive: Low tech glove.

Gauntlet: A stark-looking rented house.

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:48A513AE.42ADDC66@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
> "J. A. Mc." wrote:
>
> > On Fri, 5 Nov 2004 20:42:48 -0000, "Raphael Kearns"
> > <raphael@kearns.fsnet.co.uk> found these unused words floating about:
> >
> > >
> > >"nemo" <nemo@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> > >news:yPQid.35936$Bk6.13578@fe2.news.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > >>
> > >> Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > >> news:4189BB3B.3A410D4B@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >>> Packed Audience: Lots of suitcases in the auditorium.
> > >>
> > >>
> > >> Auditorium: Place where Conservatives keep their Audinary cars.
> > >>
> > >>For those of us who cant Afford them
> > >
> > Haven't you Benz working?
>
> Working: King of labor.

ARTHUR SCARGILL!!!!!!

Well it should have been!

 

195 days since Groundhog Day on February 2.

 

35 days since 7-11 Day.

 

350 days to Harry Potter's 29th birthday on July 31.

 

45 days since Canada Day on July 1.

 

50 days to Sputnik Day on October 4.

 

My nephew Noah is 749 days old today.

 

Stan Kegel wrote:

> Angels Sighted Over Bethlehem - Herod Calls It A Hoax (Gary Hallock)
>
> If Biblical headlines were written by today's media: On healing the 10 lepers: LOCAL DOCTOR'S PRACTICE RUINED "Faith Healer" Causes Bankruptcy
> (Lawana)
>
> If Biblical headlines were written by today's media: On the birth of Christ: HOTELS FULL, ANIMALS LEFT HOMELESS Animal Rights Activists Enraged by Insensitive Couple (Lawana)
>
> If Biblical headlines were written by today's media: On feeding the 5,000: Preacher Steals Child's Lunch Disciples Mystified Over Behavior
(Lawana)
>
> If Biblical headlines were written by today's media: On healing of the Nazarene demoniac: Madman's Friend Causes Stampede Local Farmer's Investment Lost (Lawana)
>
> If Biblical headlines were written by today's media: On Elijah on Mt. Carmel Fire Sends Religious Right Extremist Into Frenzy 400 Killed (Lawana)

On Moses: Jewish Leader Uses Weapons Of Mass Destruction Against Egypt.

On the Crucifixion: Cult Leader Executed; Anti-Death Penalty Activists
Are Very Cross.

2 Days later: Body of Cult Leader Stolen, Cult Followers Claim He Has
Come Back From Dead.

 

nemo wrote:

> "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:425A2F2B.1D1456C8@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Concave: Against spelunking.
> >
> > Content: Against camping.
> >
> > Contrail: Against hiking.
> >
> > Contour: Against French bicycle races.
> >
> > Produce: A supporter of Italian dictator Mussolini.
> >
> > Protect: Favoring innovation.
> >
>
> Deject: Removing misery.

D. Ject: A sad demon.

D. Lirious: Very happy demon.

 

nemo wrote:

> "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:42589364.3D04075C@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4257756C.6C4B57BD@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > nemo wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > > news:4254DF8B.C933379A@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > > > > nemo wrote:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > >
> > > > > > > news:42535CC0.88461789@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > nemo wrote:
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in
> > > message
> > > > > > > > > news:4250F9E7.7F96176A@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Seldom: Put a large hemisphere on sale.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Sending: Bell Senator or bell in the Senate.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Sensing: Singing Senator.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Seventy: Tea that multiplies you by 7.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Severing: Ring that cuts off your finger.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Ages ago, such sadistic things were manufactured. They
> > > used
> > > > > bi-metallic
> > > > > > > > > strips to make them constrict when they warmed up to body
> > > > > temperature
> > > > > > > and to
> > > > > > > > > make small blades emerge around the inside. There were
> > > necklaces
> > > > > too!
> > > > > > > (>!<)
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > When was this done?
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > During manufacture.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > In which years was this done?
> > > > > >
> > > > > Moslty those with 365 days and a few with 366 days.
> > > >
> > > > What were the calendar numbers of those years?
> > > >
> > > The Arabic numerals which refer to them.
> >
> > Which Arabic numerals?
> >
> The ones appropriate and as used in European mathematics to represent value
> and quantity.

What were the dates on which those severing rings were made?

 

nemo wrote:

> "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:48A3D4DC.A2A6124D@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Giants 2: An ant who is a member of a terrorist organisation of Islamic
> > > extremists whose violent activities began in 1992, and were aimed at
> > > overthrowing the secular Algerian regime and replacing it with an
> Islamic
> > > state! The swines! And be-khozzer that sort of thing we still got all
> this
> > > trouble nowadays!
> >
> > A terrorist group called "Gi"?
> >
> > > Cormorant: A large voracious dark-colored long-necked ant with a
> > > distensible pouch for holding fish.
> >
> > I saw cormorants in Florida last May.
> >
> > > Currant: Cross between an ant and a dog.
> >
> > Currant: Ant that delivers an electrical shock like an electric eel.
> >
> > > Concurrant: Cross between an ant and a dog with a big nose!
> >
> > Concurrant: Opposed to dog ants and electrical ants.
>
> Contrary!: The idiot scientist who decided that conventional current must be
> assumed to go in the opposite direction to the flow of electrons! About the
> most STOOOOOPID decision in the history of electronics!
>
> Conventional current: Keeps the nunnery's lights on.

It sexually stimulates the nuns?

 

nemo wrote:

> "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:48A512D9.89D8587@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:42296AEC.D19632F5@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > > "nemo" <nemo@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> > > > news:<B5rWc.270897$a8.238664@fe2.news.blueyonder.co.uk>...
> > > > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > > news:4129AFC7.F6E073B5@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Sheila Dundee wrote:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > > J. A. Mc. wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Mon, 5 Jan 2004 17:22:24 +1030, "Sheila Dundee"
> > > > > > > > <CorKa@optusnetXCAPS.com.au> found these unused words
> > floating
> > > > about:
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > >> Kathy wrote:
> > > > > > > >>> "nemo" <nemo@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> > > > > > > >>> news:si_Jb.309341$Y72.81374@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > > > > > > >>>> Sung by a couple of pimps who run a group of girls
> > working at
> > > > the
> > > > > > > >>>> top the the Telecomm Tower:
> > > > > > > >>>>
> > > > > > > >>>> "High ho! High ho! It's off to work we go . . . . "
> > > > > > > >>>>
> > > > > > > >>> Feeling a little flushed, off they go to the johns.
> > > > > > > >>
> > > > > > > >> I was loose myself yesterday but I hope to pickup today.
> > > > > > > >>
> > > > > > > > It's about time Tundra some work out of you! <G>
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Icy they have new wipers!
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Viper: Snakes used to clean wet windshields.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Viper: Snake price.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Saturn: Car with a ring.
> > > > > >
> > > > > Viper: Snake price???
> > > > >
> > > > > Sod it! I've adder nough!
> > > >
> > > > Subtract: A political document (such as the Communist Manifesto)
> > under
> > > > water.
> > > >
> > > Manny Festo: A guy with a nasty skin condition.
> > >
> > > Manny Pesto: A guy with a nasty a pine kernel and herb sauce all over
> > him.
> > >
> > > Pine Kernel: A high-ranking Lumberjack.
> >
> > Manny: Knee of a male adult.
>
> Manny Moore: A Yiddisher cloning expert.

What kind of meal is a Yid Dish or a Kurd Dish or a Swed Dish?

 

nemo wrote:

> "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:48A513AE.42ADDC66@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> >
> > > On Fri, 5 Nov 2004 20:42:48 -0000, "Raphael Kearns"
> > > <raphael@kearns.fsnet.co.uk> found these unused words floating about:
> > >
> > > >
> > > >"nemo" <nemo@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> > > >news:yPQid.35936$Bk6.13578@fe2.news.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > > >>
> > > >> Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > >> news:4189BB3B.3A410D4B@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >>> Packed Audience: Lots of suitcases in the auditorium.
> > > >>
> > > >>
> > > >> Auditorium: Place where Conservatives keep their Audinary cars.
> > > >>
> > > >>For those of us who cant Afford them
> > > >
> > > Haven't you Benz working?
> >
> > Working: King of labor.
>
> ARTHUR SCARGILL!!!!!!
>
> Well it should have been!

Scar Gill: Fish ouch!

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:48A6712A.E091D414@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:425A2F2B.1D1456C8@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > > Concave: Against spelunking.
> > >
> > > Content: Against camping.
> > >
> > > Contrail: Against hiking.
> > >
> > > Contour: Against French bicycle races.
> > >
> > > Produce: A supporter of Italian dictator Mussolini.
> > >
> > > Protect: Favoring innovation.
> > >
> >
> > Deject: Removing misery.
>
> D. Ject: A sad demon.
>
> D. Lirious: Very happy demon.

D. Mocrat: People are brainwashed into thinking they're demons because their
policies would take some of the rich bastards' money away from them but it's
really the Conservatives with the emphasis on the "Con" who are the real
demons!!