15 December Puns

140 days to December 11.

 

145 days to First Airplane Day (Dec. 17).

 

235 days to Saint Patricks Day (March 17).

 

55 days to September 18.

 

60 days since May 27.

 

170 days since February 7.

 

260 days since Fall of Berlin Wall Day (November 9).

 

280 days to May 2.

 

35 days since June 21.

 

80 days to October 14.

 

10 days to August 5.

 

160 days since February 17.

 

280 days since October 20.

 

300 days since September 30.

 

260 days to April 12.

 

150 days since February 27.

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:48857762.A237451C@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> Don't cast asparagus on your opponents!
>
> I suffer from Asparagus Disorder.

Is that a perversion involving lusting after little wi . . . . . er . . . .
.. ahhem! . . . Praps best left Weller loan.

Weller loan? Yes. Soldering irons are so damned expensive these days.

> Some suffer from Lime Disease.

Soldering irons can't catch diseases. It's elementary my deer What's on!

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:48857584.A31AABDB@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:40C63472.EF090D48@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > >
> > > nemo wrote:
> > >
> > > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > news:40C57438.72E8A83D@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > Adverse: Singing commercials.
> > > > >
> > > > > Amuse: One poet.
> > > > >
> > > > > Bemuse: Buzzing insect poet.
> > > > >
> > > > > Diverse: Swan song.
> > > > >
> > > > > Reverse: To sing again.
> > > > >
> > > > > Universe: A song with just one verse.
> > > >
> > > > Music: A cat that's ill.
> > >
> > > Also a sick cow.
> > >
> > Ditto, on the piste: Sick cow ski. (Later got rescued by helicopter.)
>
> Catilena: Tipsy feline.
>
> Cattlena: Tipsy bovine.
>
> Tipsy: Drunk ocean.

Who drunken ocean?

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:48857537.4530BD8@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:423003CE.A05470F6@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > >
> > > nemo wrote:
> > >
> > > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > news:4157C106.17EBF416@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > nemo wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > > Blues Buoy <ashishgandre@gmail.com> wrote in message
> > > > > > news:13697ebc.0407052121.6c436a41@posting.google.com...
> > > > > > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > > > news:<40E9104B.F4F18F98@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>...
> > > > > > > > Bob Crowley wrote:
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in
message
> > >
> > > > > > news:<40DEC5AA.DA71EA39@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>...
> > > > > > > > > > Concave: Against spelunking.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Content: Against camping.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Contrail: Against hiking.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Contour: Against French bicycle races.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Produce: A supporter of Italian dictator Mussolini.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Protect: Favoring innovation.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > bicycle - use twice only
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > bipolar - compass with north and south
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > binary - 2 canaries
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > bimetallic - very heavy metal band
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Biplane: Bisexual flying machine.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Antimony - Frugalist
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > Beryllium: Interring a guy called Liam.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Barium: Interring anybody's body!
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Potassium: Favored by stoned donkeys.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Aluminium: Tasty curried potatoes prepared by Minerva.
> > > > >
> > > > > Helium: Gas that cures.
> > > > >
> > > > > Curium: A transuranic element that cures.
> > > >
> > > > C?sium: Element that grabs hold of yer!
> > > >
> > > > So many elements to choose from, my Cuprum-eth over!
> > >
> > > Hydrogen: Gas that gives out greetings.
> > >
> > Radon: Nuclear Oxford professor.
>
> Or nuclear Mafia leader.

A mafioso radioactive!

 

"Tim Bruening" <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:4885738D.82EF9C46@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Tim Bruening <tsbrueni@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:41E204B8.F835FE73@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > >
> > > nemo wrote:
> > >
> > > > At the crucifiction, the guy next to Christ kept bragging on about
> the
> > fact
> > > > that the Romans had used three times as many nails to pin him up
> as they
> > had
> > > > used on Christ.
> > > >
> > > > In the end, Christ got fed up and said, "I really wish you'd drop
> this
> > > > 'Holeyer than thou' attitude!' "
> > >
> > > In other words, he got Cross!
> >
> > Till someone snipped the cross-post. Then he fell down right on top of
> a
> > Centurion. See? Even the Romans had our brilliant tanks!
>
> Centurion: One penny Roman soldier.

. . . from the Constellation Urion?

(A Polo 13)