Is Santa a communist.

Is Santa a communist. Think about it.
1.Santa has a beard.
1.Karl Marx had a beard.
2.Santa dresses in Red.
2.Red is the color of the commies.
3.Santa uses nonpaid elf labor in the frozen north pole.
3.Commies had their gulags in the frozen Siberia.
4. Santa gives out free presents to keep the kids good.
4. The soviets gave out free or cheap vodka to keep the peasents "good".

Santa has a spy system checking on peoples behavior
The commies had children telling on their parents behavior.

Need I say more.

 

was santa turkish or german?

st. nicholas or chris krengel?

and is christmas for the birth of christ or the death of santa?

 

oh and by the way hes a total red

 

i've always been under the impression that Kriss Kringle was some creepy old white dude, but i had an epiphany today. Santa Clause isn't white, no no, that's not the case at all. think back if you will, where was the last present you got from Santa made? ... that's right... CHINA! our favorite winter time jolly ol' fella isn't caucasian, he's just ... asian! if you think about it, this makes sense too; i mean, why else would anyone sport so much red and share all his wealth?

 

OldDan if Santa is asian then why does he drink my milk when he drops off his coal.
Aren't they lactose intolerant and stuff.
Then again the lump of coal does say "dug in China"

 

Santa is gay and Mrs. Claus is really a drag queen. I won't even begin to tell you about the elves...

 

you guys have to remember too that santa uses fast manuverable flying objects and he keeps a list of EVERYONE and what they are up to

Mrs Clause is just a cover up helper to make it go smoother

 

Are you suggesting that they are working for the CIA?

 

hmmm. I didnt think of it that way.

 

He can't be working for the CIA. His information is correct.
If Santa is a commie he's most likely east german for his real name is Kringle or something.

 

Okay, you guys have fooled around enough.


There. Phew!

 

Ha ha ha...you guys are nuts. I hope none of the kiddies are checking out this thread.

 

I don' believe we are any closer to finding out if Santa is a communist or not. We have speculated on other things such as nationality and I can tell you this, it would appear that we have all been wrong.
The old gent is simply North Polish! That is all, so guess that eliminates the communist possibility, or does it?

 

Agreed. He is North Polish. However, I do believe he may be a bit of a dictator up there, though I'm sure he's not quite as oppressive as most dictators.

 

wait wait wait Santa is canadian

There is no true north pole but there is a north magnetic pole which i believe lies in canada. Lets capture the jolly fat man shall we? Get your gun dan. We got his location, no its like catching a fish in a barrel!!!!

 

OldDan, I can not believe it but you are actually wrong for once.

Think about it, if Santa is polish then how come he never gets lost?
Must be a German. Look how he runs that factory.
I am just wondering if he is going to replace the elfs with Turks.

 

Here is your answer Andy;

NOTICE FROM SANTA CLAUS
I regret to inform you that, effective immediately, I will no longer serve the States of Georgia, Florida, Virginia, North and South Carolina, Tennessee, Mississippi, Texas, and Arkansas and West Virginia on Christmas Eve.

Due to the overwhelming current population of the earth, my contract was renegotiated by North American Fairies and Elves Local 209. As part of the new and better contract I also get longer breaks for milk and cookies so keep that in mind.

However, I'm certain that your children will be in good hands with your local replacement, who happens to be my third cousin, Bubba Claus. His side of the family is from the South Pole. He shares my goal of delivering toys to all the good boys and girls; However, there are a few differences between us.
Differences such as:
1. There is no danger of the Grinch stealing your presents from Bubba Claus. He has a gun rack on his sleigh and a bumper sticker that reads: "These toys insured by Smith and Wesson."
2. Instead of milk and cookies, Bubba Claus prefers that children leave an RC Cola and pork rinds [or a moon pie] on the fireplace And Bubba doesn't smoke a pipe. He dips a little snuff though, so please have an empty spit can handy.
3. Bubba Claus' sleigh is pulled by floppy-eared, flyin' coon dogs instead of reindeer. I made the mistake of loaning him a couple of my reindeer one time, and Blitzen's head now overlooks Bubba's fireplace.
4. You won't hear "On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen." when Bubba Claus arrives. Instead, you'll hear, "On Earnhardt, on Andretti, on Elliott and Petty."
5. "Ho, Ho, Ho!" has been replaced by "Yee Haw!" And you also are likely to hear Bubba's elves respond, "I her'd dat!"
6. As required by Southern highway laws, Bubba Claus' sleigh does have a Yosemite Sam safety triangle on the back with the words "Back Off."
7. The usual Christmas movie classics such as "Miracle on 34th Street" and It's a Wonderful Life" will not be shown in your negotiated viewing area. Instead, you'll see "Boss Hogg Saves Christmas" and "Smokey and the Bandit IV" featuring Burt Reynolds as Bubba Claus and dozens of state patrol cars crashing into each other.
And Finally,
8. Bubba Claus doesn't wear a belt. If I were you, I'd make sure you, the
wife, and the kids turn the other way when he bends over to put presents under the tree.
Sincerely Yours, Santa Claus
Member of North American Fairies and Elves, Union
>

 

Santa is British, He eats mince pies (Chopped fruit/brandy) and drinks single malt whiskey (not younger than 15years) or a decent glass of port all the rest is propoganda put out by the elfs to confuse you all :thumb:

De Orc :eating:

 

OldDan I'm just surprised that they got unionized. Down here most of the states are right to work states and we do not look kindly upon union people coming around and saying give us your money so we can elected people to office who hate you.

Other then that, I'm all for Bubba. I'll leave a shot of Jack Daniels out for him tonight with some Slim Jims and my rod incase he wants to catch a big mouth bass out back before he goes on his rounds.

 

he is to polish. he lives in the north POLE