Does what you are reading affect/inform your opinion of the world?

Maybe ignoring play is dangerous, but so is everything. If a man is trying to change himself or reach a goal and avoids danger, he won't get very far. I'm rather a hermit myself. I only socialize as I must for my family. I have no friends, no network and want none. I think the need to socialize and interact is a weakness. We must stand alone or never really exist at all.

 

And yet. You go out of your way to find a forum where you can "socialize."

If you want to stand alone then throw away all your clothes, all the technology which you use and live alone. The myth of the complete loner is just that. A myth. Your owe your very existence to the work of many.

 

I never said I had perfected this. Like most, I am a work in progress. And, anyway, being a loner is a philosophical and spiritual thing. Avoid the obvious.

 

What an empty existence and a bleak view of the world. Oh well, at least you have no need to excuse yourself for failing, since you never tried anything new at all. By the way, how does this line of reasoning explain what you are reading now?

 

The first sentence I agree with. And I believe it to be true. The second sentence has nothing to do with anything except your dislike for me and that's fine, but just to make a point a short history. I've served in two branches of the country's military, mostly active duty during the Vietnam War. I've raised two fine children and am in the twentieth year of my marriage. I've worked for the state of Kansas and the University of Kansas, worked in hospital administration, the import/export business and as a journalist/columnist. I'm a published author. I have never really failed at anything and so what? At 60 I'm trying to look at the world as it is and to quote Mr. Vonnegutt, it's all horse shit.
If you want to cause trouble when someone asks you 'what do you think' tell them. Tell them the truth. People don't expect that. They expect you to agree with them about whatever subject is being discussed. When someone asks you how you are, tell them rather than just saying I'm fine. See what happens. Try being truthful in the world (I've done so) and you will make no friends. This world is a lie we are all part of, but I try to understand this and take it at it's real value. I try but make no claims about success. I'm as full of crap as anyone. It's pounded into us from the get go. It is bleak out here, but so what? The truth is often unpleasant, but it is still the truth. If you want to live in your comfy chair and grin out at the nonsense it's certainly your right and I won't mock you for you. I will say I think it's a cowardly life based on lies and myths.
As to the original question I've just picked up the top four books from the pile by my chair. It is impossible to properly read one book at a time. One book raises a question that you must look elsewhere to answer and so on. I've got six going right now. The top four are 'On Killing' by Lt. Colonel Dave Grossman, 'Cosmos and Psyche' by Richard Tarnas, 'Pagans and Christians' by Robin Lane Fox and 'The Old Gringo' by Carlos Fuentes.

 

PS

Dear Hollysmom,

In my response to your attack on my life I neglected to add I've gone to sea, been a deck ape and radioman, shot expert with the .45 automatic, gone to jump school and then jumped from an airplane, was a member of the Honor Society at the University of Kansas, have won awards for my poetry, and, when I was eight, had a child named after me because I had protected the infant's older brother from playground bullies. You done anything lately?

 

I stand by what I said. You choose to live a negative life. If you come in bragging about how empty your life is and how you need no one and consider socializing a weakness *and then* brag about all your accomplishments related to people . . . you've got a bit of cognitive dissonance going there. You brought bleakness to this thread and, for all your claims of being a hermit, drew attention to yourself and made yourself the focus of this thread. More cognitive dissonance. I can't say if the books you are reading now are a reflection of your life choices or whether they are informing your life. However, in my opinion, either way--you could use some different reading material. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy might be a good start--it's pretty bleak, too, but can be pretty humorous. In my opinion, you need to have a bit more levity in your life . . . *shrugs*

Right now I'm reading my "Exploring Research" textbook and will soon begin reading a selection of dog training books to prepare for my new pet dog training class, as well as a new book on beginner dog agility training. I am starting two new puppies in agility and it's been a loooooong time since I started a new dog, so I need all the tips I can get. I'll go through them one at a time, since I disagree that it's "impossible" to read one book at a time, but I might divide my time between those books with some fun fiction and I will probably read a few magazines (Clean Run, Show Sight, Woman's World) concurrently.

 

I haven't done any serious reading for around 25 years. Like the internet but can not say when was the last time I brought a book or took anything out of the library for myself. Not a joke. Just is.

 

"I get along fine with dogs and children, it's adults I have problems with."
Me

We fleeting bits of scheming energy,
killing ourselves building legacies,
refusing to hear God's laughter.
Me

I didn't brag about anything. I mentioned an aspect of my life that is true and remains despite various attempts to change it. The sorta-hermit's life is not easy and I'm happy that both my children are social. I made a comment on a comment and then answered your attack on me. You said I could never fail because I never tried, implying cowardice. I answered that with the facts of my life which I believe prove you wrong. You accuse me of having an "empty life," and I responded with showing you how full it has been. And all that activity is what has lead me to where I am. I'm not recommending this to anyone. Most people want to live in happy ignorance and that's fine. Some of us make the attempt to look outside our myths. That's not to say that we see the "truth," but we are trying. This all began when I was making a comment on a comment and then you began preaching how empty my life was and what a cowardly way it is to live. I only answered.

May I recommend further reading? Party of One, A Loner's Manifesto' by Anneli Rufus, 'Solitude, A Return to Self' by Anthony Storr, 'Moral Minds' by Marc D. Hauser and 'Against Happiness' by Eric G. Wilson, if you dare.

 

I can understand that, Andy, but people don't just read books. The Internet consists, in large part, in reading. When I use the Internet, I come here or I go to animal welfare-related sites. I also play games. Yes. Many games.

 

K Dawson, I say this with complete nonjudgmental love in my heart. Go talk to a professional. I am frightened for you.

As to your reading material? Thanks, I'll pass. I choose not to make myself miserable. However, let me suggest some material to you:

The Promise: God's Purpose and Plan for When Life Hurts andGod Wants You Happy: From Self-Help to God's Help, both by Fr. Jonathan Morris.

A Grief Observed, by C. S. Lewis

Made for Happiness: Discovering the Meaning of Life with Aristotle by Jean Vanier

If you dare.

 

I don't. I prefer Socrates.

 

*meh* Another excuse.

 

Yeah, well. It was Aristotle who began the errant path Western philosophy has taken and remains on. This was the compartmentalization of knowledge: metaphysics separate from logic and both separate from ethics. I think they are all mixed in together and must be considered in relationship with one another. This is what I find admirable in Eastern philosophy, but I question the worth of 'enlightenment' or 'nirvana.' It seems to me both are simply getting yourself in a happy place and so self-serving. One must stay in the struggle.

 

Why? What use is it being miserable all of the time?

 

Why do you keep saying I'm miserable? I get by nicely thank you. Being happy is pretty much useless. Happy people do very little except sit there grinning. Disgruntled and unhappy people are the ones who drive society forward, who come up with new ideas and innovations. The ones who really do something. Happiness is inherently selfish and ignoring the truth to maintain your jolly mood (I mean nothing personal here) is simple cowardice. Now you're probably going to allege that I sound superior and look down on the common man. I don't automatically, but I must say it seems to me that very few people ever think about anything. They just go along like the guys that slammed the gas chamber doors shut and the guy who shot the infant in its mother's arms at My Lai. We must learn to be disobedient when we think something's wrong and not go with the crowd. The most proud Vietnam vets I've met were proud of not shooting when they were improperly ordered to.
Fitting in is a surrender.

 

KD does your life as you live it now give you what you want out of it? if yes then more power to you sir I also know what you mean about giving honest answers yep sometimes they can not only not be what is expected but downright confusing for the person on the other end of them These days I am more circumspect LOL

 

De Orc,
Thank you. I don't know if it's giving me everything, but I feel I'm a lot closer to what I want from life and expect from myself than I ever have been. When I was college age I experimented with being completely honest, but abandoned this as it bothered people so much.

 

What does it benefit you to live your life so ostracized? Is "getting by" really enough? I really stand by what I said. I fear for you. However, I point this out again, you have successfully made this thread about yourself and have derailed it from the original conversation. For a person who claims to prefer being outside a social circle (which your very presence here belies), that seems a smidge hypocritical.


Just put this in here if you dont mind HM (Rather than get of topic with the rest of the thread) one thing about it is that not everyone likes to be surrounded by company and chatter all the time (I for one prefer my own company but I can still be sociable) Much depends upon what ones live experiences are. Also in all honesty what is wrong with simply getting by? many many folks wish they could say that

 

Hollysmom,

You are right about getting away from the thread and I apologize for that, but I felt I was under attack when you keep telling me how miserable and marginalized I am. I happen to think one needs to be at the margin to clear their heads. And then you charged I never tried anything and I answered that. However, when I'm on the defensive I do get carried away.